Family Friday: How Your Family Can Participate in Lent

By Dea' Daniels

The unique, challenging, and potentially beautiful season of Lent is upon us.

Unfortunately, between recovering from the swirl of Christmas and looking toward the sweets of Easter, many families miss out on the rich potential of these forty days. Perhaps it's because we know so little about this tradition.

What is Lent?

First, while Lent is traditionally seen as a Catholic observance, it is most certainly for all who desire to follow the Way of Christ. Beginning on Ash Wednesday and ending on Easter Sunday, the season stands as a remembrance and an observance of the forty days Jesus spent fasting, as well as His time of testing in the wilderness.

The season challenges believers to abstain by participating in the discipline of fasting (in various expressions), but also offers the opportunity to gain much as we face our inner desires and temptations.

How can my family participate?

It is my growing belief that all expressions of our faith can and should be shared expressions of our family. As we kneel and pray and participate in the Eucharist, we invite our sons to kneel with us, to speak with us, to eat with us. As we learn to meditate, as we support the poor, as we open our home, our children are not only observing, but they are willing participants. As we celebrate the seasons of our faith, be it the anticipation of Advent or the darkness of Good Friday, we are compelled to step away from the easy flannel-board stories and make space for our children to ask the tough questions so that they may partake.

With that in mind, even Lent, a time of fasting and potential struggle, can be a family affair. 

•       Why not begin with the ‘real’ story of Christ’s forty-day trial. Engage in an honest discussion of what we desire as individuals. What do we desire? Why? Where do we find our worth, our strength, our answer?

•       Consider a ‘family fast’ such as forty days away from certain media or food or (here’s a tough one) catch phrases or attitudes.

•       Discuss how you can balance your fasting with an expression of giving: food bank contributions, the amount of money from that certain treat given to a certain charity, an action within your community

•       Take the first step for your family, and see what happens.

What if My Spouse or family is not on board?

•       Your spouse, immediate family, or close friends may or may not share your approach to the season of Lent. Instead of simmering and wondering why they won’t participate, open your mind and heart, and let go of expectations. Quietly fulfill what you are convicted to believe and express, and be eager to learn from the parallel journeys of others. You may be surprised.

•       If you have a community with whom you can participate, do so! (Church? Small group?)

If you want to lose a few pounds, go on a diet. Don’t go on a diet and call it Lent. While participating in this season will almost always lead to unexpected and affirming outcomes, this isn’t the time to focus on being pretty.

       As you journey into this season, I encourage you to take time alone to hear what these days could hold. As questions, scriptures, ideas, and issues arise in your heart, share them with your partner and children, and be willing to consider and embrace what our God reveals. This season is not meant to be comfortable. It begins with a cross of ash smudged upon our beauty and it journeys through days of death. But, in the end, it arrives at that great morning when we arise in the light of the resurrection with clean faces and the shout of “He is risen!”

A Traditional Lenten Prayer

Jesus come and save us,

We are but dust, 

We are like ashes,

but you can touch our unclean souls.

Jesus come and forgive us,

Our hearts are heavy,

Our burdens are great,

Cleanse us with the water of life.

Jesus come and heal us,

Restore our sight,

Teach us truth,

Speak to us words that bring us wholeness.

Jesus touch us with your heart of love,

Cleanse us with the water of life,

Restore our sight that we may see, 

Teach us truth that we may lead Godly lives.

Let's talk: What does Lent mean to you?

Dea’ is a mama to boys, a former college educator, a writer, and a ‘simple-green-living’ home-maker. Currently residing in small-town Alberta while her husband practices as a medic in the north, Dea’ can be found chasing her boys and backyard chickens while experimenting with whole foods and (attempting to) break into new areas of writing and other creative things. You are welcome to follow her family and story at wholedei. All of Dea's Family Friday posts can be found on one page.